Here it is!!!  FINALLY a loud and weird and cute maximalist puffer coat to keep your bones warm.  FREE SIZE ONE SIZE it's fashion to have some volume on that coat honey.  Long sleeves keep your hands from freezing and falling off.  

FABRIC: that swishy poly.  Lining is black! 

MEASUREMENTS chest 48" length 32" sleeve 28" hip 58"

The possum dress strikes back !!! Regency vibes or maybe it's maternity, up to you. This one's in the favorite fabric, 90% cotton & 10% spandex, so it's soft, stretchy, and breathable. Maxi length, short sleeves, screaming possums. Very proper tea dress for the fete or whatever!!!

FABRIC: the greatest 90% cotton 10% spandex

MEASUREMENTS -

XS - bust 28" - 32" waist 24" - 28" length 50"

S - bust 30" - 34" waist 26" - 30" length 51"

M - bust 32" - 36" waist 28" - 32" length 52"

L - bust 34" - 38" waist 30" - 34" length 53"

XL - bust 37" - 41" waist 33" - 38" length 54"

2XL - bust 39" - 45" waist 35" - 42" length 55"

3XL - bust 42"- 48" waist 38" - 46" length 56"

4XL - bust 50" - 60" waist 44" - 48" length 58"

5XL - bust 54" - 64" waist 50" - 58" length 59"

Rooster of Romance, oversized canvas Valentine type of chicken bag CHICKEN BAG CHICKEN BAG, come and get it!

Okay, i tried to get up at 6:30 today to write a better caption than this but then I slept until ten. ✨🏆✨

Honestly I just LOVE how it came out, a better looking bag than 99% of them I’ve ever seen, to be honest 😎🏆 but I grew up in the 90s & 00s when a hype handbag was $300 & covered in logos. Wear your art on your sleeve or whatever! Do what you want!

Play “ain’t nobody here but us chickens,” by Louis Jordan 🎸the world’s greatest lyricist of all time.

The hypervigilance dress - anyone who looks at YOUR butt gets a dagger in their eye! Soft & stretchy but very aggressive in 90% cotton, 10% spandex turtleneck maxi dress with a comfy, breathable, bodycon fit - covered with eyes and swords & barbed wire!!! a 60's Peter Max vibe with a dash of Sabriel / white hair (from stress) tumbles on your shoulders & a leopard turtleneck for fashion, babey!!! Oh and the world's MOST comfortable corset of all time - I have personally fallen asleep wearing this dress. In total, there are TEN SWORDS on this dress, which is a lot of swords. Also, when you bend your arm, it bends the sword on your arm, which means you are VERY powerful. A note on the fit - there is wiggle room! This dress stretches an extra 4-6 inches wherever you need, but when it's really stretched, some color vibrance gets lost, so the best fit is closest to your measurements. This dress looks amazing on everyone.

FABRIC: the greatest 90% cotton 10% spandex

MEASUREMENTS -

XS - waist 28" bust 32" hip 34"

S - waist 30" bust 34" hip 36"

M - waist 32" bust 36" hip 38"

L - waist 34" bust 38" hip 40"

XL - waist 36" bust 40" hip 42"

2XL - waist 38" bust 42" hip 44"

3XL - waist 40" bust 44" hip 46"

Remember sleepovers???  Well, neither do I, but anyways, I gotta secure the bag - and so can you!  FUN BAG!  It’s a big fun bag, for your stuff!  This round and perfect shape is a grandiose 23 inches across, bright canvas tote with a motif of hearts & eyes.  Pink zipper, says “beautiful genius” on it, what else to say... idk it’s a statement piece?  But aren't they all?  IDK...it’s far out & it’s groovy too!  Yeah babey!!!  Only $99 & guaranteed to make you smile for ten thousand years!

Let everyone know about your passion for sports!  This soft and strong top has arrived to cover your amazing torso.  Can you lift heavy items with your wonderful hands?  Are you a truly intimidating Sigma male with the mindset of the grindset... of a lion?  A lion wearing sunglasses?  This shirt is for you!

That's right, step into flawless victory dressed as your true self, & invite the amorous attentions of those who share your affinities - when you leap over a crevasse, to fight a brutal animal or a swamp monster, one shining bead of sweat appears on your golden brow.  You are the champion!  You are the apex predator!!!  Gains.  

Stretchy, breathable, and soft 90% cotton 10% spandex blend feels good on the body! 

FABRIC: 90% cotton 10% spandex

MEASUREMENTS

XS: chest 31" length 25"

S: chest 35" length 26"

M: chest 38" length 27"

L: chest 40" length 28"

XL: chest 42" length 29"

2XL: chest 44" length 31"

3XL: chest 48" length 32"

A short and tight skirt for your butt!  Stretchy & sassy with a theatrical stage and a fancy frame, because your butt is a Work of ART!!!  Looks great on you!!!

FABRIC 90% POLY 10% SPANDEX it's matte & bright

MEASUREMENTS

XS - waist stretches from 22" to 28" length 16"

S - waist stretches from 24" to 30" length 17"

M - waist stretches from 26" to 32" length 18"

L - waist stretches from 28" to 34" length 20"

XL - waist stretches from 30" to 36" length 21"

2XL - waist stretches from 34" to 40" length 22"

3XL - waist stretches from 37" to 44" length 23"

The Champion Robe - high drama pajamas & your favorite pandemic look.  Light & swishy, unlined, comes with a sash, but looks great worn open too! Please wash cold cycle & hang to dry 🌈✨🏆💅🎨💪🏼🍄💄🧠 BTW this robe features swears & nudity, so it's pretty badass™️ 😆

FABRIC: 100% poly but it's light & swishy & breathable ITS NICE

MEASUREMENTS 

S - 40” bust & 44” hip

M - 42” bust & 47” hip

L - 45” bust & 50” hip

XL - 47” bust & 53” hip

2XL - 50” bust & 55” hip

3XL - 52" bust & 57" hip

The EXTRA fancy possum scarf - is now big! Genuine 100% silk satin 36" square satin scarf with a hand-rolled hem & my drawings of your favorite animal in the whole world! Get ready to scream because this is luxury at its deranged best. You've met Gucci, Hermes, and Versace scarves, this one is at home among them. An immortal scarf is born. Not just decadent, historically relevant. Experience the meme, the magic, the legend, the icon, the possum. The opossum. Oh my.

The Zodiac Dress! It's elegant and mysterious, but perfect for sitting with your legs wide open. All twelve signs are featured in the pink and purple and red and yellow nightful star universe! I think it will age as a garment in a really lovely way, like an old tee shirt, as the years go by, the cotton will get soft & wispy. I think it has a medieval maximalist wizard princess vibe. It's very autumnal and dramatic, but comfortable too, so you would still want to wear it all day by yourself. I think it runs a little small, but it's stretchy too. Maxi length with a high waist & three-quarter sleeves.

FABRIC: the greatest 90% cotton 10% spandex

MEASUREMENTS -

XS - waist 28" bust 32"

S - waist 30" bust 34"

M - waist 32" bust 36"

L - waist 34" bust 38"

XL - waist 36" bust 40"

2XL - waist 38" bust 42"

3XL - waist 40" bust 44"

4XL - waist 44" bust 48"

5XL - waist 50" bust 54"

Easy breezy beautiful comfy possum shirt dress!!!  It’s the blessed & highly favored 90% cotton with 10% spandex light and breathable cotton in a simple drapey dress shirt thingy - pajama?  I would definitely wear this to sleep yeah!  One size!  Kinda unisex, can also be tied on the side for that flirty summer look.  

One size - chest 50” front length is 31” and back length is 38”

Reefer madness in a swishy, breezy, comfy, carefree, wacky AF dress with a flounce & a sunset palette of orange & purple & pink & yellow. Not only is this dress perfect for your inner marine biologist, you can also spill coffee on yourself twice a day (I certainly do) with no worries.  I only put the bust measurement since it's pretty much a tube with a ruffle.

FABRIC: lightweight & breathable poly. Wash cold cycle & hang up to dry!

MEASUREMENTS

XS - bust 34" 

S - bust 36”

M - bust 38”

L - bust 40”

XL - bust 42”

2XL - bust 44”

3XL - bust 47”